


Inquisitor's Inquiries

by spiringempress



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-15
Updated: 2017-11-27
Packaged: 2019-02-02 23:41:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12736683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spiringempress/pseuds/spiringempress
Summary: Valaena is fond of asking Cullen difficult questions about their relationship. However, her often innocent question drudges up either bad memories for her commander or secrets he's been keeping.





	1. The Broken Circle

**Author's Note:**

> This is based on my headcanon and thus deviates from the facts. It's based on the fact that my warden, Faelan Cousland is a red head and so is my inquisitor, Valaena Trevelyan. So in Dragon Age Origins despite not being a mage, Cullen had a massive crush/infatuation on my warden. And because she had the same fiery red hair as my inquisitor, Valaena, Cullen was initially reminded *cough* attracted *cough* to her for certain reasons.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Valaena is fond of asking Cullen difficult questions about their relationship. However, her often innocent question drudges up bad memories for her commander. Ones about his behavior in the tower and proceeding actions, as well as his belief that he has been given a second chance to prove himself to the woman, who once talked him down in the broken tower.

Happily ensnared in the arms of her commander, Valaena was without a doubt wide-awake. It was probably due to the fact that once again, the two had tumbled into his bed within the lofty tower in Skyhold and every few seconds a cold breeze brushed over her skin and sent goosebumps down her spine. As a result, Valaena squirmed closer to Cullen and found that the sensation of his breath, which tickled the nape of her neck, also kept her awake. Often, Valaena found herself within this predicament; unable to sleep and consequently, her mind wandered replaying bits of conversation between her and Cullen. Usually during these moments, she attempted to pinpoint the meaning behind his bumbled sentences. Perhaps more fortuitously, she found sleepy Cullen less guarded and more willing to answer some of her inquiries without his usual reluctance.

Valaena was stroking his hand, tracing his calluses and various scars that marred his skin when a conversation bubbled to mind. It had been after their first kiss and Valaena had found herself concerned about her family's reaction to Cullen. More so, his reaction to her family's snide comments about her choice and whether she could have chosen someone with a better pedigree. Her family like any other noble family was proud and fond of political advantages. However, it was not his response to her family that interested her, but something else he said during their conversation

"Cullen," she murmured, receiving a drowsy grunt in reply. "Do you remember after we first kissed - you said something about wanting to do that for longer than you should admit? Exactly how long?

Valaena was greeted by silence. Typical. He was either ignoring her or had finally fallen asleep and somehow wouldn't remember her inquiry; whichever one would not reward her with any answers. She signed and closed her eyes, letting herself melt into the mattress and Cullen's grasp. However before she could fully relax, her back was suddenly greeted with coolness as the warmth of Cullen disappeared. Wide- awake once more, Valaena sat up and looked over at him. He was sitting up and running his hands through his tousled hair. Alarmed, Valaena reached over to him and wondered if he was worried about her family again. She remembered after the initial conversation, Cullen had burst into her chambers and wanted to know her mother's favorite flowers, her father's opinion of the templars and the name of her brother.

"Are you alright? Did you have a nightmare?" she asked, reaching out and stroking his arm.

Cullen shook his head while looking at the inquisitor. His amber-gold eyes filled with apprehension before he diverted his gaze and began to rub the back of his neck nervously.

"It's rather embarrassing. Of course, most matters are to me anyways," he stammered, refusing to meet her eyes. "Of course, I'd wanted to kiss you for a long time. Perhaps from the moment we met, but in truth it was not for..."

His voice trailed off and Valaena became positively confused. At this point in their relationship, Cullen should not have been embarrassed to reveal this information. Especially when she had already confessed her early attraction to him on the battlements of Haven. And more so because he had seen Valaena at her worst. There had been nights when she had been racked with anxiety about the upcoming battle and other nights when Iron Bull had drank her under the table.

Valaena grasped his hand and squeezed. This seemed to calm him and without looking at her, Cullen took a slow breath and squeezed back.

"This probably won't come out right, so if you want to leave I understand. I wanted to kiss you from the moment we met," he said in a low voice, "but it was not for the normal reasons... It's just when we met you reminded me of someone I met a long time ago in a broken tower when I was a different man... a very scared young man to be more specific."

Valaena did not take her eyes off of Cullen. She tried to take advantage of his pause and capture his gaze, but he adamantly refused her. Her heart was pounding in her chest. Never before had she elicited such a response from him. Normally, he gave a vague answer or snored in reply. She pursed her lips and waited for him to continue.

"I know we've talked or I've talked about the events that transpired in the tower and Kirkwall and well... my hatred and fear of mages, as well as, some of the things that I wanted to do to prevent what happened from ever happening again, but what I didn't mention was that she was there," he said, suddenly looking at Valaena, "The Hero of Ferelden, although, she wasn't known by title yet. She was simply a grey warden. There were a lot of horrible things that transpired in the tower, but she walked through the despair and blood as if she was invincible," he paused, lost in his memories, "I thought she was an illusion and when I finally realized she was real. She became the most beautiful sight I had ever seen."

Valaena raised an eyebrow and withdrew her hand from his.

"At the time," added Cullen hastily, eyeing her carefully before continuing, "I was nineteen and the only girls I knew were my sisters. Maker's breath, I knew I should have never told you this story it was bound only to make you upset."

Still wary, Valaena reached out and brushed his hair into place regarding him with caution. "Finish your story. Perhaps, you can still salvage my wounded pride."

Before she could react, Cullen grasped her hand and kissed it. "I don't know if you've ever seen the Hero of Ferelden," he said in a low voice, raising his eyebrow, "but she has red hair swept back into two buns and a great sword swung across her back. She also has a way of talking to people, where she tried to understand the other person's point of view. She never dismissed anyone or their beliefs. So when she found me in the tower, she tried to help me see beyond my fear. After, I was awe of her - I couldn't help but develop a crush on her. You may cite looks, but it was her ability to see me at my weakest and still treat me as a human. I may have stalked her a little and asked for any news of her exploits afterward," Cullen said sheepishly, "shortly, I learned she stood up for those, who were defenseless, those mistreated and threw herself into battle without any consideration for her own safety. Eventually when she killed the archdemon and became queen, I saw her again when King Alistair presided over the decision for the Ferelden circle. Of course, I attended because I experienced it first hand and she came up to ask how I was - I still regret my answer. I was still angry and scared, but she nodded and told me I had nothing to fear. Even though, she did not make the final decision or the one that I wanted, her council was wise and considered both the mages and templars.”

Cullen paused and looked at Valaena. “It’s easy to stand by one side and ignore the other. It takes great courage to stand between two warring groups and unite them under a common goal. And Faelan was able to accomplish that. It took me many years to realize that I had acted like a complete fool. That I had persecuted innocent people and let fear cloud my judgment. I always thought about Faelan and how she must see me as that hateful boy in the tower. I took this position because I wanted to do something right - to put aside differences and protect as many people as I could. When I saw you, you took my breath away. Yes, you may remind me of the Hero of Ferelden but you are so much more," Cullen paused and pressed her hand to his chest, " I saw her in you when we were in Haven because you were scared, but fearless and because you have the same compassion and the ability to see the person beneath all the politics, rumors and fears. You believe in fairness and in your friends' judgment, even if they have made questionable choices. And I thought to myself, 'Cullen, this is your second chance. You weren't for Faelan, but you could be a man worthy for this fiery haired maiden.' Maker, I sound ridiculous," muttered Cullen, looking away before returning Valaena's gaze, "but you are my second chance to be a better man, to be a good one."

After he finished, Cullen continued to hold her hand near his heart. Valaena fixed him with a stare. “So, what I’ve learn is that I’m second best and if King Alistair hadn’t already swept Faelan Cousland off her feet – you would be by her side?”

“No,” said Cullen firmly. “Don’t you see? Without her, there would be no Cullen to serve at your side. I would either be dead or off killing mages – the latter probably earning your attention-“

“Cullen,” interrupted Valaena gently. “I am only teasing you. Not that I haven’t thought about killing an archdemon to get your attention… I know, you have struggled with your past, but you are a good man. One worthy of this inquisition and of a certain fiery haired maiden,” she paused deviously, “You know once we find her-

Quickly, Cullen attacked and tickled her sides until she was breathless with laughter and smothered in kisses. “I would prefer the attention of a _different_ red haired maiden _ _,”__ said Cullen, burying his face into her shoulder to avoid eye contact.

“Well, this _fiery _haired maiden__ prefers her commander to be more like King Alistair,” stated Valaena, holding up her fingers to count off, “Devilishly handsome, loyal without question, speaks of his undying devotion to random inquisitors and oh, secretly heir to the throne of Ferelden. Maybe now, should be the time I tell you about my-

Cullen silenced her with a kiss before pulling away and fixing her with a stare. “Not if I have a say in it,” he paused once more, “I have never felt this way before. You make my days brighter and now, there’s hope for what happens after. So whatever happens next, I’m glad I served this inquisition and became a man that somehow deserved you.”

Valaena leaned forward and kissed him. He pulled her closer to him, settling into the nook of her neck and afterwards, they stayed in that embrace for the rest of the night. As her eyes drifted closed, Valaena thought that sometimes her inquiries resulted in the answers she needed to hear.


	2. The Tower Window

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In a spare moment, Valaena manages to escape her daily duties and visits Cullen's office. However, he seems more interested in his paperwork than the subtle advances of his inquisitor. As a result, Valaena is forced to inquire about Cullen's hesitation and discovers that her commander hasn't been entirely honest with her.

Valaena had finally managed to escape the daily meetings with various politicians and conferences with Josephine among other diplomatic decisions that had come to consume most of her time at Skyhold. In this rare moment of freedom, she decided to venture up to Cullen’s office to see if he was busy. Soon enough, she slipped into Cullen’s office and closed the door behind her with a decisive click. She eyed the commander as he sifted through various papers that littered his desk. He did not seem to be aware of her presence as his face displayed a very prominent scowl. Valaena smiled to herself and sauntered over to the desk, pouncing on the polished surface and effectively, crumpling some of the parchment. In response, Cullen jumped as Valaena deviously smiled at his startled expression. 

“Maker’s breath. Didn’t you think to knock?” 

Valena arched her eyebrow mischievously and slowly inched her way across the desk towards a nonplussed Cullen. “I thought closing the door would attract your attention,” teased Valaena, pushing her tongue to the tip of her upper lip, “However, you seemed to be besotted with your papers.” 

Surprisingly, Cullen proceeded to inch backwards away from the desk with said paperwork in hand. Valaena felt bemused. Of course, she had not ventured up to the tower to talk about the contents of those papers but to receive some much needed attention from Cullen. At this point, Valaena felt her efforts were not working as planned and instead, Cullen seemed intent to browse his papers and ignore her hints entirely. Perhaps she needed to step up her game since on previous occasions Cullen had missed her subtle innuendos. Boldly, Valaena waltzed around the desk and proceeded to wrap her hands in the fur of his cloak and use it to pull him to her. She not so subtly pressed her hips against his and looked at him from beneath her eyelashes. Again, her actions were met with a lack of enthusiasm. Consequently, Valaena pulled away to look at Cullen and received a truly alarmed expression. 

Deflated, Valaena wrinkled her forehead and stared at Cullen. She wondered if something had gone wrong in the field as he detached himself from her and started to wring his hands. “What’s the matter?” asked Valaena as she crossed her arms and waited for Cullen to reveal the problem. 

Cullen set down the paperwork and nervously scratched his neck. “It’s just - I don’t know how to handle this…I mean, here you are and here I am and you’re so beautiful,” he bumbled, turning more red as he spoke, “and, I’m not handling this well...”

Utterly confused, Valaena’s thoughts began to race. On one hand, she found his blush to be very endearing, but on the other, she still wasn’t sure what the problem was. Cullen refused to meet her gaze and stared at his feet while fidgeting with his neck. For some reason, it clicked. 

“Cullen,” she started, looking at his downturned face, “Are you a virgin?” 

Valaena did not know the commander could turn that red until now. He flushed bright red and noticeably gulped before turning away from the desk. In a couple of seconds before she could react, he went to the window and pulled back the curtains and slid the window open. Next, he placed one foot on the ledge and was about to pull himself up. Startled, Valaena lunged at him and pushed herself between him and the window. As a last ditch effort, she threw her arms up and blocked his way. 

“Cullen?!” she admonished, fully alarmed. She tried to evaluate the situation before asking, “Are you trying to jump out of the window? It’s more than a hundred feet to the ground. What would that accomplish exactly?!” 

Halted, Cullen hunched over and buried his face in his hands, shaking his head slowly. “Yes... No... I don’t know,” he muttered, “I wasn’t thinking... Well, I was, but not very clearly. I just… don’t know how to face you right now.”

“So jumping out the window seemed like the best solution?” asked Valaena alarmed. “Maker’s breath, Cullen. That’s absolutely unnecessary. There’s no need to feel ashamed. I just - why did you find it necessary to make a break for the window?” 

Clearly exasperated, Cullen furrowed his brow while also rubbing his forehead. “I don’t know. I told you I wasn’t thinking clearly and wanted a moment to clear my head,” he paused, and breathed out again. “When you came into the room, I wasn’t thinking about that until you started inching across the desk and I froze. Suddenly, I was back in the mage tower unable to think or talk or move, but I couldn’t run away from you. You’re my- um… and well, I want to please you and wasn’t sure how to tell you,” he said in a low voice, stepping towards her, but still keeping his distance. 

Valaena paused, before moving across the space to press a gentle kiss against his lips. Shortly, the two broke apart and Valaena evaluated him. “You could never disappoint me unless of course, you jumped out a window,” she teased, before adding quickly, “This won’t change my mind nor my opinion of you.”

Cullen smiled briefly before closing the space between them and leaning forward to press his forehead against hers. “I don’t know what I was thinking... Actually,” he added, “I wasn’t thinking at all. It’s just… it’s something I don’t think about, but I knew I would have to tell you.” 

He sighed and pulled away. Valaena cautiously watched him as he turned back to the window. He leaned against the pane and stared out at the snowy mountain tops. Carefully, Valaena approached the window and warily eyed him to be sure that he would not make another attempt. 

“When I was a young man, my younger brother, Branson, grew taller and more handsome than me. This of course, awarded him the attention of all the attractive village girls. They mercilessly flirted with him, hoping to catch his favor and sometimes, at the end of the day, they settled for second best,” described Cullen, he stared at Valaena for a couple of moments, “However, no one was willing to lose their innocence to the stammering brother, but I did learn some tricks. Eventually, I left to be a templar and of course, the circle happened then Kirkwall and nothing seemed more important to me than getting through those days. I didn’t have time to dwell on it and I didn’t think about it until the inquisition happened. When you came into my life.” 

Cullen chuckled, and looked at Valaena. This time, held her gaze. “I started to worry about what would happen and how would I tell you. Would you laugh? Perhaps you would find someone else. And then I heard the rumors about you flirting with… well, Blackwall, and your conversation with Leliana about umm… stamina and it well,” he paused and then quickly said, “it made it worse.” 

Valaena smiled to herself and leaned against the stone wall to face Cullen. “If you’re asking whether I’ve experienced the pleasure of male company, I won’t lie to you. When I was younger, I was quite adventurous and a bit rebellious. I also liked to scandalize my mother with my behavior. My favorite was when she caught me in the curtains with the duke’s son,” started Valaena, before seeing the horror on Cullen’s face. “Anyways, my point is I’ve been with a lo- I mean, some men, but I have never felt this way. I cannot wait to see you when I return from the far corners of the world, to hear you laugh and feel your hand sneak into mine during dinner. And when I’m out there,” said Valaena, gesturing towards the window, “I see something extraordinary and I wish you were there to see it, so I store it away so I can tell you about it later.”

She stepped closer to him, brushing her hand down his arm. “You shouldn’t be intimidated by my experience, because this is as new to me as it is to you. In those relationships, I never considered them afterwards. It was just a bit of fun, something to amuse me and horrify my mother. I’ve never been in love until now and honestly, this doesn’t matter to me. You’re my commander and more importantly,” Valaena paused, drawing a breath and trying to contain her smile, “you’re someone that I want to spend the rest of my life with.” 

Suddenly Cullen turned towards her and hesitated before he looped his arms around her waist and pulled Valaena towards him. “Do you mean that?

“Yes,” answered Valaena, grinning brightly at the squirming man before her. “You cannot run away from me. You’ll have to find a way to be content with me.”

Finally, Cullen relaxed and tightened his grip on her. “I can think of worse situations.”

“Yes, like falling to your death in the Frostback mountains,” teased Valaena. 

“Can we please never speak of this again?” begged Cullen, resuming a bright blush. 

Valaena shook her head. “Certainly not, I plan to tell everyone in Skyhold, including a certain gentleman named Bl-

Before she could finish her sentence, Cullen silenced her with a kiss. Perhaps that particular kiss was the beginning of what Valaena originally had escaped to his office for, or it was a promise of it in the days to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is based on an idea my friend and I came up with when we were talking about Cullen's reaction to being flirted with in Origins. So I want to send a shout out to her for being awesome. 
> 
> As a full disclosure, I'm not 100% positive that this is my headcanon for Cullen's character. I do think it's a strong possibility (and I like the idea of female characters being more sexually experienced) but at the same time, I don't want the Cullen x inquisitor romance to be an Alistair 2.0 because there is only room for one. SO, I could go either way. 
> 
> I don't know why I felt it was necessary to add this note, but it's here and I love to over-explain my life/choices.


End file.
